Oh dear, I think you just described my day.
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When you say ‘hominid’, is it possible you mean ‘homunculus?’

And yes, this read as so close to the bone a marrow donation seems like an easy combined shopping trip.

Wow! You’ve just explained my 16 hour day (which could easily be shrunk to 6). I can SO identify with this. And it IS gross. I hate myself.

Okay, I don’t hate myself, but it’s an issue I’ve been wanting to confront for awhile. If anything, thank you for writing this post – it’s empathetic.

Sorry thing for me is that instead of giving up the laptop for my fiance, I’ve actually passed the addiction onto her (she’s recently launched her blog and going after the same dream). So we have one functional disfunctional family life.

That’s okay, the first step is admitting there is a problem.
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There are some times that it is absolutely essential to pretend that you are working.

I know that everyone feels bad about this, but there are times that you just have to avoid your kid. I even hide from mine in the bathroom.

When I get sick of the bathroom, I pretend that I am working. You really can’t tell your kid that the reason that you don’t want to play with them is that you have to check out which celebrity’s picture has cum drawn on their face today — you are, after all a role model. But you really do have to avoid your kid if you don’t want to go absolutely nuts, because living with a small child can be like living with an imbecile. Not the kind of imbecile you keep in your attic or barn that can be totally satisfied for hours with a cotton ball and a piece of string, but the kind of imbecile that screams uncontrollably, despite having been given a cotton ball and a piece of string, for reasons that are totally inscrutable to the non imbecile. Not to mention, they poop on you.

If you spend your kids bail money on crack, or load all their toys in a cart and sell them for crack, your are a “crack mom.” If you pretend you are working to avoid playing the same game for the trillionth time, you are a good role model.

this post reminded me when my son was an infant 8 years ago. i was mesmerized by some CRAPPY vh1 segment about, and i’m so embarrassed to admit…burt reynolds and lonnie anderson. anyway, my son was valiently trying to get my attention cuz’ he was hungry, and i said “shhh! not now!

that was a true “crack mom” moment, and i canceled my cable service the next day.

Let’s bring back the days of procrastinating with Macgyver, at least then you walked away knowing how to make a bomb out of a stick of gum and rubber band, a tool that someday may save our lives. Now that’s procrastination at it’s best. The images by the way are perfection.

Muah,
Alma

In fact, I’m nursing right now. Not kidding.

If I look down and see him looking up at me, I realize I’m being rude so I stop typing. But if his eyes are closed…well, might as well make use of the time and leave a comment…