Talking Shrimp
copywriting. jumbo style.
First things first: the baby above is NOT related to me. I don’t want anyone thinking it’s my new nephew, Samson, who’s way cuter. Apologies to parents of Superbaby. Now that that’s out of the way… The NY Times has an article in this week’s Science section claiming that humans are born helpful. The proof? […]
KEEP READINGSarah Palin is printing money with that stupid book of hers. Know why? Because she’s “polarizing.” Polarizing = $$$$. So I’ve decided to become a polarizing figure, too.
KEEP READINGI was walking along Bleecker Street yesterday and just had to snap this photo. Then, some dopey tourist saw me taking the picture and whipped out his own camera. Copycat. I hate it when people copy. He must have thought we’d both stumbled on a tableau of unexpected, urban beauty. Actually, I wanted to document […]
KEEP READINGA quick shoutout today to my friend Miranda Levenstein, whose latest blog post offers a cake recipe as remedy for Seasonal Affective Disorder. If I baked, I’d give it a whirl. It has to work better than the special SAD lamp I bought two years ago.
KEEP READINGI don’t see why everyone’s so worried about H1N1. Do you know what’s way much more contagious than swine flu? I’ll tell you what: cologne. Bad cologne. You can catch it from someone just by being in the same room. Or pizza shop. You’d expect to come out of a pizza shop smelling like pizza, […]
KEEP READINGFact: Old ladies love free food samples. Actually, it doesn’t have to be food. They’ll take anything that’s free, including those stinky soap samples they hand out outside Sabon. You can always use more soap! But they like food the best. Is it a fixed income thing? A scarcity mentality left over from the Great […]
KEEP READINGYou may think you make your own buying decisions. But not for long. Soon, your nose will tell you how to spend your money.
KEEP READINGLOL!! What’s so funny? Oh, nothing. I just typed that to fill an uncomfortable silence. That’s what everyone else does. I mean, come on: how often is someone really laughing out loud, or even smiling, when they use LOL? I’m not completely against LOL-ing. I’m okay with it when it’s in reply to something funny. […]
KEEP READINGAt some point, someone powerful must have decided that any reference to relaxation, wellness, spirituality or “Me Time” must be paired with one of two photos: 1. Some chick wearing white, sitting in the lotus position 2. Some chick lying down with a row of hot stones on her bare back Really? Well-being equals yoga and […]
KEEP READINGDo they still make Very Special Episodes and After School Specials? I hope so. They were the cornerstone of my education in Things Not To Do, like drugs, drinking, drinking and driving, bingeing and puking, killing yourself, and getting molested by the nice man who owns the bicycle shop. (Poor Dudley.*) Those TV shows served […]
KEEP READINGToday I was sitting at my local coffee place, Joe, listening in on the next table. Because I do that. This woman said to her friend, “You’re so lucky. You have such perfect hair.” Perfect Hair Lady smiled in a guilty way, like she was feeling sorry for those with less fortunate hair. She touched […]
KEEP READINGIn the past couple of years I’ve been into some self-help-y, self-discovery-ish stuff called “Transformation.” If you know me, you wouldn’t think it was very me. I’m not a rainbows-and-butterflies-and-group-hugs type. But I’m attracted to the practical side of it: all about living in the moment, how what you resist pers– never mind, I’m getting […]
KEEP READINGI turn 40 today. When you reach 40, you get nostalgic for things just because you remember them. At least I do. I was like, “remember Menudo?” and then I was like, “Awww, Menudo!” ABC used to show them in the Saturday morning commercial breaks during the show “Dear Alex and Annie.” I went to […]
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