It’s my birthday! For the occasion, I will answer your top birthday FAQs. Thanks for asking! Any big plans for tonight? Birthday party? Just dinner out, which is fine by me. If I had a party, I’d spend weeks worrying that I can’t not invite you, but if I do, will you mix with my other friends? Or […]
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The million-dollar pickle story
I believe, with all my heart, that everyone has a story to tell. Whether they should tell it, or know how to tell it, is another story. A story I will tell right now. So I’m at the pickle stand on Carmine and 6th Ave, asking the guy for samples. (If you think that all my human interaction centers around […]
KEEP READINGNormal is amazing.
Hey there, all back to normal! Oh right, you missed the part where it wasn’t normal. Last night, Steven and I dropped by a neighborhood place, Claudette, for dinner. We ate at the bar, and toward the middle, somewhere between the cauliflower appetizer and our chicken tagine, my ankle started hurting. Really hurting. It hurt like […]
KEEP READINGThe Boy Who Ate My Challah
This weekend is Yom Kippur, the holiest and highest of high, holy holidays for a good Jew. I’m a bad Jew, so I pretty much ignore it. Though many times I’ve used it as a diet kickstart, because you’re supposed to fast all day. We were never good at that as a family. My parents would […]
KEEP READINGHappy Birthday to me! Wait, what?
Today, even though I’m trying not to wake up and look at email, I woke up to this lovely email. So sweet, but unnecessary. And, if my mom had been cc’d, she would have sent an immediate retraction. Because guess what? IT’S NOT MY BIRTHDAY. My dad’s 82. Normally, my first thought would be to call my parents and […]
KEEP READINGYeah, you. Yeah, you.
My husband is my favorite person to run into on the street. First, I don’t have to worry if I look OK because if I don’t, he’s already seen it. Second, there’s no question about whether we’re going to stop and say hi. No awkward moment of already having waved/ nodded hello and then doing the tentative […]
KEEP READINGI cried.
Went to the most beautiful wedding this weekend. The ceremony was on the water’s edge in Montauk, Long Island, right as the sun set. The couple, both genetically blessed and stylish in their own right, knows every sexy, surfy person in the sexy-surfy-person mecca that is Montauk. And they both have good looking families. So that was the guest […]
KEEP READINGAre you busy like I’m busy?
A friend on Facebook just posted a link to a NY Times piece about how “busy” we all are. And how compelled we are to answer, “you know, busy” when someone asks how we are. Not an original observation, but the fact that I saw it on Facebook felt so fitting, and made me think about what I really […]
KEEP READINGNeurotic medical and physical sh*t I’ve googled
The other day, I opened my iPad as Steven was walking by, and this was on the screen. When he saw that, he hugged himself and rocked back and forth blissfully like a child embracing a favorite teddy bear, which is what he does when I do or say something stupid that he wants to […]
KEEP READINGThe good kind of jet lag never lasts.
Help! My jet lag is deserting me. Eastbound jet lag sucks, but I love the westbound kind. It’s the only thing that makes me wake up early, unless you count having to pee, or leg cramps. I’m genetically programmed to sleep till at least 9. I’m very defensive of my night-owl/ morning-sloth tendencies, because I don’t like […]
KEEP READINGBusted!
Here are things I’ve been busted for lately: Checking myself out in a window. By someone inside the window. It was a dark little administrative office at the pier for free kayaking or fishing or something that adventurous people do in the Hudson, and I didn’t think anyone was in there – till I noticed motion behind […]
KEEP READINGTen things I do when I’m tired
1) Walk towards mirrors and say “‘scuse me” to my reflection, and try to get out of her way. 2) Have a heartbeat in my eyelid. 3) Get deja vus that become deja vu about a deja vu. Did I think this thought before, or am I remembering thinking I’d thought this thought before, or was […]
KEEP READINGHow I rock the morning in under 30 steps
Now that Ive blogged 5 days in a row (including this one), making me one of the World’s Top Bloggers, people will want to know the keys to my success and creativity. It’s inevitable. I’m not gonna be shitty about it like Angelina Jolie was on the red carpet when E! asked her what she and […]
KEEP READINGI want to climb into the Giraffe pen
Just read on Gawker about a woman who climbed into a zoo’s giraffe pen and got kicked in the face by a giraffe named Wally – plus fined 686 bucks. Why would anyone do that? Her answer: “I love giraffes.” I kind of get it. Not the giraffe love, I’m totally indifferent to giraffes. They’re […]
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