Emails I hate:
– Client emails asking for revisions, especially when those revisions are ones they could’ve done themselves in less time than it took to ask for them (“Can you please change the word ‘digital’ to ‘online’ and capitalize the network name at the top of the script? Also, I believe there is a period missing at the end of the last sentence. Please insert one.”)
I usually respond to these by writing a long paragraph about how much time client would save by typing these things right into the script, time the client could spend doing her other favorite thing: scheduling meetings about meetings. And then I delete it all and send the requested revision.
– “Biz tip” newsletters that are consistently boring but I can’t bring myself to unsubscribe from because I have a fantasy that I’ll one day implement or “take massive action” and make the “7 figures” implied by most of the subject lines.
Emails in “Keep As New” Hell:
These are the ones I mark as unread for way too long, and then have to ignore the red circle that says I have new emails, because I don’t.
– Anything with a question. “Does Thursday work for you?” “When can we have dinner?” “How much would this cost?” “Coffee?” “What were your capital gains this year? Please let me know by Monday.” These are a part of being alive, and not answering them means no business or social life, or sometimes going to jail for tax evasion. But they’re hard!
– Novel-length ramble about your tragic life, which requires something sympathetic (or, now more trendy, empathetic) and not too short, or it’ll look uncaring
Emails I love and open right away:
– Screen grab or forward making fun of someone’s business promotion. Especially if it’s for a women’s “Juicy Abundance” retreat and there’s a sexually suggestive pic of the leader with a horse.
– Screen grab or forward or comment making fun of anyone or anything, period
– “Dinner tonight? I’ll make the res” from my husband
– Overheard dialog between my parents, reported by my sister (“Where’s the remote?” “In your hand.” “Which hand? Please be specific.”)
– Better yet, compliments that say “You’re welcome. Don’t reply.”
– Rude unsubscribes, because they’re funny. (“Reason: It’s junk mail.”)
– [NAME] sent you money by Paypal
– Your return has been processed, a refund was issued to your credit card.
How do you categorize your emails?
What stays “keep as new” forever in your inbox?
What’s your dream email?