“Salt your cucumber” and other handpicked Talking Shrimp emails

Here’s a curated archive of Laura Belgray’s Talking Shrimp emails.

That’s me, referring to myself in the third person, just in case it’s good for SEO. That’s also me, hoping lots of people are searching for “archive of Laura Belgray’s Talking Shrimp emails.” Or maybe:

“Best email newsletter examples from Talking Shrimp.”

And that’s not me trying to stuff the post with keywords. I don’t really think it’s a common search term. I don’t write for SEO. I write for you—you being the person who gives me compliments and money for my writing.

These emails are not in any particular order. Not of date, open rate, greatness, or jerk level (mine).

Most are from the past couple of years, when I started upping my email frequency. I think that practice produced my best stuff.

All got great engagement (clicks, replies, and, where applicable, purchases).

Several take place in restaurants.

Two, on a bus.

One, on a highway from hell in Tel Aviv (or, that night, Hell Aviv).

A few have links to things you can no longer have or attend.

Some have been showcased and celebrated.

#2 gets the “Email of the Week” honor, where email copywriting expert Chris Orzechowski breaks it down passage by passage on the page. You can read that post here.

#6 gets the “Copy Chief” tribute —where Kevin Rogers dissects and even gives a dramatic reading, framing as his favorite examples of storytelling. Listen here.

Without further ado (which I keep seeing people write as “further a due” – NO), here are, subjectively speaking…

The best email newsletter examples from Talking Shrimp:

1. Can you say “ballsack” at a funeral?
2. OMG – stop procrastinating! (split test with winning subj: kill my housemate)
3. OK, I’m full of $#*t
4. I’d pay all day NOT to do this
5. “What if my life is boring?”
6. Why are we RUNNING?
7. World’s worst fish (split tested with winning subj: “worst I ever had”)
8. Salt your cucumber, be a boss
9. This writing trick is *literally* bananas
10. Maybe jerkface was having a bad day?
11. This is for the lazy ones
12. Uh, bye! (Not you, [FIRST NAME])
13. Here we go again.
14. Problem
15. I’ve been a jerk
16. “At least you’ll have a story”
17. How lazy can you get?
18. Sell me, please
19. When I go to the dark place
20. I’m going to eat my face now.
21. Disappointing friends, stolen bathing suits, and incompetence

Got a favorite? Leave a comment!

And if you like these and aren’t signed up for my emails, that’s some kind of self-sabotage! What are you doing with your life? Why not ask for what you want? FFS, Sign up for Talking Shrimp in your inbox here!

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